The No Contact Rule: I have made it to one week!

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VICTORY!!!

So I have done it guys; I have officially made it through one week of no contact with the 'barely there' guy. I must say, this has probably been the most resilient I have been in getting over a casual relationship with a guy. And when I think of how strong I really am, I often wonder why I let myself get into the position of getting hurt in the first place, and save myself the pain.

Don't get me wrong, I still think about him and miss the idea of him, how he treated me in the beginning, the dates we went on, the mind-blowing sex we had. It has only been a week so it's normal for me to still have those thoughts. But I challenge myself to think less and less about him and the memories because I know it isn't productive thinking and it doesn't keep me in the present moment. Not only that, but I know he isn't sitting there dwelling about it or thinking of me so I don't want to waste any more time or energy thinking about him. Whenever he does come to mind I try and switch the focus to something else more positive because that is more useful and beneficial to me. I can worry and worry about him and wonder how he is and what he is up to until I am blue in the face, but it isn't going to get me anywhere other than an anxiety spiral. And I'm sick of being in anxiety spirals over guys, they are simply not worth it.

I know it's okay to think about him though. I don't try and block out my thoughts about him, I accept that they are there because we all feel things for a reason. But my focus is on trying to move away from that and not dwelling on it for too long. Has anyone ever heard of dedicated periods of worry? It's when you dedicate an amount of time in your day for example, half an hour at night where you can fester and obsess over whatever it is troubling you. But you can only do so in that set period of worry. After that you move on. I try and do this when I can so it forces myself to not think about him during any other part of my day. As I've read in 'The Power of Now', you are not your mind, your mind uses you. It's like a disease. I won't let my mind use me because I am in control, I have the power to choose my thoughts.

The no contact rule has really turned my life around. Of course when I first walked away I felt that nothing was going to get any better, that I would never get over him. It's so hard to think positively when you are in so much pain. But day by day, things get easier and I feel less anxious, less stressed and less sad since removing him out of my life. So I know it was the right decision. Every week that goes by will make me even stronger and eventually I will wake up realising I am over him, and that will be the best day.

Each week I will reward myself for no contact with this guy and tonight I will reward myself with my favourite take away in London :) A well deserved treat in my eyes!

#selfworth #selflove